Using GODLIKE With a Partner Who Is New to It
It's in the suitcase, zipped into a toiletry bag, and you still haven't mentioned it.
How to introduce GODLIKE to a partner who's never used a toy: the conversation before the first session, who holds it, and what to say when it gets awkward.
The Short Answer
Say it out loud before the suitcase comes out. Keep the first mention short and low-stakes: what it is, why you like it, and that they can say no without it becoming a thing. On the night, let them hold the handle first with the motor off. Start at the lowest level, keep it to 10 minutes, and plan something ordinary afterward.
The Conversation Before the Device
Timing does more work than wording. Bring it up over dinner, not in bed. A conversation that starts at 11 p.m. with the device already out reads as a request, and requests in bed are hard to decline gracefully.
Try three sentences. "I have something I use on my own. I'd like to try it with you sometime. If it's not your thing, that's completely fine." That's it. No demo, no justification, no list of benefits. The invitation is the whole message.
Then stop talking. Silence gives them room to be honest rather than polite, and polite agreement is worse than a real no. If the answer is "maybe later," treat it as a no for tonight and mean it.
The First Session, Slowly
Hand them the device with the motor off. Let them feel the weight, the curve, the bend in the handle. Give it 30 seconds without saying anything, because commentary fills the space that curiosity needs. Curiosity is easier than arousal, and it's a much better entry point. Most hesitation is about the unknown object, not about you.
Then set a small frame. Ten minutes, one setting, no goal. Esther Perel has argued that naming a time in advance creates anticipation instead of killing it, and that holds here. A small frame lowers the stakes for both people.
Who holds it matters. Let the person receiving it guide the handle, or rest your hand over theirs. That way the angle is never a guess made by someone who can't feel it. It also removes the performance pressure of "doing it right."
Finding the Angle Together
Start external. The curved tip doesn't have to go anywhere on the first night, and using it externally for 3 minutes builds a shared reference before anything else. At 11 p.m., with the lights already low, that's the easiest place to begin. Then ask, out loud, whether they want to try internal.
If yes, insert slowly with the handle angled down so the curve points forward. Their hand on yours gives you feedback without a narration. Stop at the first flinch, and don't fill the pause with an apology.
Keep the level low for the first 90 seconds. The most common mistake couples make is treating the first session as a demonstration of what the device can do. It isn't. It's a handshake.
The Awkward Parts, Handled
The first time you do this, someone will laugh. The angle will be wrong. The lubricant bottle will fall off the bed. Laughing is a pressure valve, not a verdict, and joining in costs nothing. Trying to keep the mood serious is the thing that usually breaks it.
If your partner asks whether this means they aren't enough, answer directly. "This isn't a replacement. It's a different thing we can do together." That question is common, and a vague answer makes it worse.
Don't compare. Not to previous partners, not to what you use alone, not to anything either of you has seen on a screen. Comparisons land as instructions, and instructions in bed rarely produce the thing you were hoping for.
The Next Day Matters More
Say something ordinary in the morning. "That was fun" is enough. The absence of a follow-up reads as regret, and regret is the fastest way to make sure it never happens again.
Then wait 2 weeks before suggesting it again. In that gap, keep the rest of your intimate life unchanged. A new device that becomes the main event feels like a project, and projects get abandoned.
When This Isn't the Right Move
Skip it entirely if your partner has already said no. A second ask after a clear no isn't persistence, it's pressure, and the catch is that pressure is indistinguishable from enthusiasm when you're the one applying it.
Don't use this to fix a larger problem. If touch has stopped for months, a toy introduced as a solution lands as a critique. The other honest limitation: some people simply don't want a device in the room, and that preference doesn't need to be talked out of them.
One Handle, Two Hands
If you're introducing this to someone new, the handle is the part that makes sharing easy.
- GODLIKE: a bent handle that fits two hands on the same grip, a curved tip for guided angles, and low levels quiet enough for a conversation; best for couples where one person is learning the shape.
- Browse the Customer Favorites collection for options that are easier to introduce.
- Related reading: when your partner is new to all this covers the conversation in more depth.
- GODLIKE settings worth learning first is a good next read before session two.
Sources
- Esther Perel — public writing on anticipation and scheduled intimacy in long-term relationships.
- Kinsey Institute — public research summaries on couple communication and sexual behavior.
- American Psychological Association — general guidance on consent and communication.
This piece is general education about communication and product use, not medical advice. For concerns about pain, health, or relational safety, talk with a qualified professional.
